No, It Is Not, Mommy!...and Other Assertions From My 5 Year Old Teenager.

I asked around in our Village—you know, that group of hand-picked family and friends that lend their light to our daughters—and according to them, this stage is quite normal.  Apparently, this sort of aggressive opposition often serves as an indication of developmental progress, and a healthy awareness of herself as separate from everyone else—even her parents—and well within her rights to have a differing opinion. 

Wonderful! But before I go prancing away to check off her Developmental Milestones chart with a hearty grin, I stop to realize one not-so-minor detail...homegirl is only FIVE YEARS OLD!

Lately, my big girl and I have been...not arguing (because she's five), but just butting heads, even in silence.  Kris and I have always taught Marley that her role as a child in our household is not to attempt to find reasons why she should agree with the rules we've set, but to obey them, and trust that God intentionally placed her in this particular household, and therefore, we are equipped to take care of her.  Believe it or not, she gets that.  So much so,  she often repeats her paraphrased version of that sentiment to her 3 year old sister when she does her Gangsta Boo thing and decides to buck the system (a practice in which Sage has always been quite versed, I might add).

So, it's not that I'm surprised when Marley tries to mow me into the ground with her assertions of why she "just can't see how it makes sense to do something if she doesn't get it."  Things like how she should be allowed to say "fart" because "it's the same exact things as saying 'pass gas', and that's why they invented synonyms".  Or things like how I "just don't listen to her when I'm upset, and just because I'm the mom, doesn't make it okay to be frustrating to a child." Yeah, um, stuff like that is...well... frikkin annoying...to the point of ear-released steam and prayer, and chanting, and white wine indulgences.

Image credit

One soul to another, I'm happy for her, you know? The fellow human part of me wants to high-five her for that personality and fire that sees no reason to be soothed or rationalized out of what feels right for her.  As her mom though, meh...not so much!

What do you do when you have a beautiful li'l thinker on your hands, who's only doing a natural, healthy thing by passionately expressing her feelings, but toeing the line of eliciting "unsafe" (yeah, let's use that word) responses from her loving, well-meaningand trying hard to leave room for home girl to grow, but finding herself questioning if this room she's allowing will cause more harm than good in the long run mother?? Hello! I need answers, people!

The Path to Peace Project (Rwandan-style) & Your Holiday Table

Photos courtesy of Macys.com
and Fairwindstrading.com

THANKSGIVING for us is truly about JOY each year.  Cousins with whom I was raised, aunts and uncles who serves as additional parents for my generation, and new additions to our family through marriages and new babies (yaay!), come together to eat, dance (you know Island people have to dance), and shoot the proverbial breeze.  Here's a shot of one of our last Thanksgiving/Birthday celebrations:

This year, my mom (who I swear is missing her true calling as an events coordinator) forced us suggested we add a "Jamaican Idol" element to our festivities.  This means that my cousins in Florida might be practicing dance moves while I'm sitting here typing...better hurry, as I WILL NOT be outdone by people who's diapers I have changed!

Of course, besides the fellowship, the grubbings are about to be on an' poppin', and come Monday, I'll be consuming salads and limiting my precious brownie-intake so that I may feast guilt-free.  Another element that has me extremely excited is the addition of The Macy's "Shop for a Better World" program to my family's table by way of supporting the Rwanda Path to Peace Baskets and the Rwanda Textiles projects. Please consider these meaningful works of art as you shop for holiday gifts and decor this season.  Much like the thought that goes into choosing our menu, making provisions for elders in our family, and the anticipation of the gathering itself, these limited edition crafts are meant to be shared, start discussions, and make other people happy! The baskets, for example, are meant to be gifted to other people and each pattern symbolizes specific ideas such as patience, bountiful harvest, and good fortune.  The textiles are inspired by traditional Rwandan dress, and are as meaningful as they are captivating.  See for yourself!

Village Print

This print shows the warm and friendly patterns of Rwandan village life in times of peace: curving paths lead from one house to house, from friend to friend, clusters of plump fruit hang, waiting to be plucked, flowers bloom, the garden rows are dotted with sprouting plants coming up from fertile soil. A winding stream brings the delight of gurgling sounds and clear, cool water to drink. The villagers live in graceful balance with the earth and their neighbors.

- Naturally dyed sisal coil-sewn over bundled sweetgrass  

- Hand-woven in Rwanda 

- Because each bowl is a unique work of art, variations in size and color will occur  

- Includes a numbered Certificate of Authenticity

Wouldn't these look great on your holiday table?  I know I'll be using the complimentary basket and table linens I received for participating in this project—Thanks to The Blogrollers!—to grace our family's table and start a conversation about what these beautiful women have overcome!   For the full-monty on details of all things Path to Peace, go to the Fair Winds Trading site, and please spread the word!

**Keep an eye out for the basket giveaways that'll be happening in your blogosphere in the coming few days!**

I leave you with our menu assignments for your viewing (and salivating) pleasure: (and yes, it says "curried goat" because some Island people eat goats--Gasp!

Maggie:                                    Turkey

Barbara:                       Stew Peas & Jasmine Rice

Valerie:                        Vegetable Lasagna, Cornmeal Pudding

Paulette:                      Curried Goat, Plain Rice, Ambrosia

Maxi:                           Honey-Baked Turkey Ham

Nikki:                           Plantains (6 ripe ones)

Jared:                          Ground Turkey Cheese-Pasta

Frederick:                    Gourmet Corn, Soup

Howard/Zakkiyah:        Wheat Rolls, Smirnoff Ice, Water

Joan/Dennis:                Fruit Salad

Akilah/Kris:                 Wine, Carrot Juice, Home-Made Fruit Juice
Barry:                           Wine Coolers, Heineken

Michael:                       Mango or Vanilla Ice Cream

Prendy:                         Rice & Peas

The premise is brillianty simple: "We should never have to choose between beauty and health.  The two should go hand in hand."
CrisSimone.com

LOVE.THAT.  Don't you?  

I've been itching to tell you about this site, but I took a tip from a couple of stars and decided to "coincidentally" post this at the same time as my album release feature.   CrisSimone.com is an online beauty and wellness resource specifically designed for women of color.  NOT because all women aren't welcome to the site, but more likely because of the disproportionate number of women of color who suffer from totally avoidable illnesses.  The site celebrates us in all our glory -- healthy, professional women who embrace their fullest selves by maintaining a healthy lifestyle, inside and out. Very much in line with the Execumama philosophy, so when I was contacted about being a featured woman, I used my favorite one-liner, "Um, yes, please!"

Here are my two favorite sections of the site:

The Expert View where I lost track of time reading about "best practices" from top notch dermatologists, holistic health specialists, make-up artists, style experts, and more!

The Blog which put me on to products like Priti Soy Polish Remover - squeaaal!

Do yourself two favors: 1. Check out the site, and 2. Pass it on to your girlfriends.  It's a great resource for those of us who are serious about maintaining our #hotmamasociety status! Beauty and health certainly do go hand in hand, and over at CrisSimone, you can draw from a well-stocked cabinet of people who know just how to keep us as FLY/HEALTHY/BEAUTIFUL as we deserve to be!

Friday's Find: The Yes-inator!

 Friday's Find

Tell the truth, your children are way more amazing than you, aren't they?

MINE TOO!

When you were 5—better yet 3 years old, did you not only conceptualize, but draw, color and cut out a "machine" that helped you to get the desired response from your parents?

ME NEITHER!

That little do-da pictured above is called the "Yes-inator", and our girls created it so that they can flash it about in Kris' or my direction before they ask us something that will likely glean a negative response.  They wanted to do movie night on a week day, so the Yes-inator conveniently resurfaced after a few weeks in hiding.  I think they might have seen it on an episode of Wow! Wow! Wubbzy!, but I still think it's freakin' awesome that they sat together (without arguing!) and made this thing about 4 months ago, and to this day insist that it will eventually work.

INSANELY BEAUTIFUL, NO?

Okay, now you tell me a quick story about one of your children's AMAZING factor. I'm sure there are tons of stories to go around.

I'm such a sap. Deal with it! :)

Announcing The mini-Footballers Project!

--Click the picture to read the details--

Hi guys!!!!!

I haven't been blogging for a long time because mommy and daddy said I needed some time to adjust to being in school.  I told them I was already adjusted, but they didn't even think so, but in my head I said I am !!!!!!  Anyway, mommy is still being my typist because I'm not super-fast yet, but I'm working on it, so don't be sad or anything, ok?

This is my guest post, which means I'm borrowing space on mommy's blog, but I'm still blogging on my blog, so still look at it, because I put a video on there!!!!!!  Anyway, I'm blogging now because my sister Sage (who is not a plant, but a girl who's 3 years old) and I are doing our second donation project. It's called The mini-Footballers Project and I hope you can get to help us because we really need your help!  Here's the flyer that my daddy made with Photoshop and InDesign because he's a graphic designer, which is almost like a fashion designer, but not for clothes.

--Click the picture to read the details--

We will be going to Jamaica in the middle of December, and we want to take the shoes with us.  Okay, so now my mom linked to my video so that you can see it when you come over to my blog.  Again, this is Marley on mommy's blog. Bye!

Starting this week with a wonderful memory

That's when it all began right there.

Marley was 16 months old, and Kris and I were officially "working parents", him at a design agency, me as a Marketing Assistant at a great  company!

Who knew it would only get better?

SO much for which to give thanks!!!

...and the WINNER...

...OF THE FABULOUS WHIMSICARD PRIZE PACK, CHOSEN BY RANDOM.ORG, IS...

The winner of your drawing is...

1st	harlem.minded

Congratulations on the drawing! It was completed on Friday, 6 November 2009 at 14:51:45 UTC. The winner was drawn from a list of 22 entrants using true randomness, which for many purposes is better than the pseudo-random number algorithms typically used in computer programs. You will find the permanent record of the drawing here:

YEP, SHE WON AGAIN!!  Must be her frequent visits to this site that's bringing her such great fortune!!  Her prize includes: 

- TEN (10) personalized kids Thank You cards

- TEN (10) Spa cards

- A Free phone consultation for your next party

(Your total win is valued at over $150!  SCORE!!)

A SPECIAL "THANK YOU" to all of you for being a part of this giveaway!! I will continue to be selective about the types of giveaways I host, and I hope you continue to find value in the products and services that I bring to your attention.

Another SPECIAL "THANK YOU" to Whimsicard for sponsoring this giveaway!!!